Leading Consciously Reflection #21

In the beginning, the book was just a wild idea – a pipe dream.  

Reframing Change, my first book with Jean Ramsey, had been published in 2009.  It featured several principles and skills for leading inclusive teams that we named Conscious Change skills.

Since then, we have trained probably thousands of people in the skills described in the book, in our classrooms and professional workshops.  Over the years we both have heard from former students or workshop participants who are eager to tell us their stories of pivotal incidents in which knowing the skills salvaged a tough situation, saving their relationships and reputations, and giving them the tools to propel their organizations forward.

As story after story was told to me, I began to develop a pipe dream. I imagined that some of them might be willing to write up their stories to be published in a book. That way interested people could see examples of how the skills had been applied in various settings by people from different backgrounds and facing different problems.

Just a pipe dream. But it kept nagging at me. Was it even possible?

One day almost on a whim, I decided to send out an email to my former students to see if any might be interested. I had no idea what to expect and to my amazement, several people responded that they would be interested.

For the last couple of decades, I have used what I call the “open door/closed door philosophy.” If you want something, stand in front of a door that might contain the object of your desire. If it opens, you know you’re supposed to walk through. That’s the universe giving you a clue. 

In this case, if students respond to my inquiry, that’s the universe giving me a clue. 

If I stand in front of the door and it slams shut, then I know I’m not supposed to go in there.

So I sent the email and waited.

Within a day or two, several people responded that they would be interested and asked me questions about what it would entail.  

My mouth flew open in amazement. I realized that I was standing in front of an open door. 

I quickly drafted some guidelines for chapters in which people would tell their stories of using the skills, and sent it out to those who responded.

Soon afterwards, a second door opened. Eliot Davis, one of the book contributors, was taking an independent study with me at the time. I asked him if he’d be willing to help with the book by interviewing potential contributors who didn’t think they would have time to actually sit down and write their chapters. He readily volunteered to do so.

I took that as yet another open-door sign that perhaps this book was somehow supposed to become a reality. But I wasn’t convinced yet.

Emboldened by Eli signing on to help, I then decided contact former students and clients who had personally told me their amazing stories, to determine their interest in contributing to the book.

More people responded, and in my mind, the book idea jumped from the being a pipe dream to becoming a tiny plant in an incubator. Would it grow and thrive, or would it die from lack of sunshine and water?

In 2020, Covid moved in and took over the country and a third door appeared. Behind the door was the possibility the plant would miraculously and suddenly get the food and water it needed to thrive.

I heard from Jean Ramsey, my co-author with Reframing Change, our first book. When she and I last talked about our work, she had declared she was now happily retired in the mountains and was birding around the country with her sister. Because of her new hobby, she had declared she was no longer interested in doing further work with me. 

Now, because of Covid, she was reaching out, explaining she could no longer travel and wanted to know if she could be useful in Leading Consciously’s work.

I metaphorically held my breath and gave her several options, one of which was to co-author this second book with me.

To my surprise and delight, this was the option she chose. Now for sure, a third door had opened. Three times is a charm, and I knew without a doubt the book would become a reality with Jean Ramsey on board.

And here we are.  The pipe dream has become a reality.  I’m still amazed at how it all happened.

We are thrilled to tell you that our new book, Conscious Change: How to Navigate Differences and Foster Inclusion in Everyday Relationships, will be released July 9, 2024. In the book, 19 authors describe how they used some of the six principles and 36 skills described in the book to navigate potentially polarizing situations in multicultural settings.